The Potters Orchid Railway

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GAP
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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by GAP » Mon Dec 13, 2021 8:30 pm

philipy wrote: Mon Dec 13, 2021 7:48 pm Nice start Dazza.

I'm a wee bit concerned though. We know he has on previous inspections been known to, err, shall we say " Over imbibe", and there is your multi-day Christmas bash coming up......!
No problem just throw another couple of prawns on the barby and put few extra stubbies in the esky that should fix it. What could go wrong with that??? :dontknow: :dontknow:
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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by Hydrostatic Dazza » Sat Dec 25, 2021 7:25 pm

We are yet to find out what Mr Spectre thinks of the POR's Christmas lights.
He has not yet emerged since he met the marvelous Miss Cindy at a railway party a week ago. It could be that Miss Cindy has been known to make dead men groan in all kinds of weather and Mr Spectre was looking a bit stressed when he arrived. I am sure he will return to work soon.
:P

ImageIMG_7773 by Darrell McCulloch, on Flickr

ImageIMG_7757 by Darrell McCulloch, on Flickr

ImageIMG_7772 by Darrell McCulloch, on Flickr
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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by ge_rik » Sun Dec 26, 2021 1:16 pm

Very festive! :thumbup: :reindeer: :santa: merryxmas

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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by Andrew » Sun Dec 26, 2021 1:24 pm

A proper Winter Wonderland, looks like great fun!

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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by Peter Butler » Sun Dec 26, 2021 2:52 pm

Siting outside in shorts and flip-flops.... why didn't I think of that?
The best things in life are free.... so why am I doing this?

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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by philipy » Sun Dec 26, 2021 4:39 pm

Peter Butler wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 2:52 pm Siting outside in shorts and flip-flops.... why didn't I think of that?
Errrr... I've seen the forecast for your part of the world... swimming trunks or wetsuit maybe? 8)
Philip

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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by ge_rik » Sun Dec 26, 2021 5:10 pm

philipy wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 4:39 pm
Peter Butler wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 2:52 pm Siting outside in shorts and flip-flops.... why didn't I think of that?
Errrr... I've seen the forecast for your part of the world... swimming trunks or wetsuit maybe? 8)
More likely - longjohns, parkah, sou'wester and fur lined boots

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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by Hydrostatic Dazza » Sun Dec 26, 2021 7:09 pm

philipy wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 4:39 pm
Peter Butler wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 2:52 pm Siting outside in shorts and flip-flops.... why didn't I think of that?
Errrr... I've seen the forecast for your part of the world... swimming trunks or wetsuit maybe? 8)
I think the English test team need the rain in Melbourne. Up here is south east Queensland, it has been wet, but still very warm. It will be swimming trunks, no need for a wet suit. But we got a run last night, after cleaning MAM's burner jet and I repaired Taliesin which had a blow back burn on lighting which melted the servo arm, up so it was replaced. MAM put some little lights on her Bonsai trees in the railway. MAM is trying out a new gimble gizmo for her phone so we might be able to live stream a running day soon.
Cheers from Dazza, The Hydrostatic Lubricator 8)
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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by Hydrostatic Dazza » Sun Dec 26, 2021 7:11 pm

ge_rik wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 5:10 pm
philipy wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 4:39 pm
Peter Butler wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 2:52 pm Siting outside in shorts and flip-flops.... why didn't I think of that?
Errrr... I've seen the forecast for your part of the world... swimming trunks or wetsuit maybe? 8)
More likely - longjohns, parkah, sou'wester and fur lined boots

Rik
If you did that here in Queensland at this time, you would be rushed off to hospital and given drugs.
Cheers from Dazza, The Hydrostatic Lubricator 8)
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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by GAP » Sun Dec 26, 2021 8:37 pm

Hydrostatic Dazza wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 7:11 pm
ge_rik wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 5:10 pm
philipy wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 4:39 pm

Errrr... I've seen the forecast for your part of the world... swimming trunks or wetsuit maybe? 8)
More likely - longjohns, parkah, sou'wester and fur lined boots

Rik
If you did that here in Queensland at this time, you would be rushed off to hospital and given drugs.
More likely taken straight to the funny farm to wean you off the drugs.

SWMBO commented that "it is a bit nippy this morning" in Bundy temp 23C presently Max forecast 27C
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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by Hydrostatic Dazza » Sun Dec 26, 2021 11:16 pm

GAP wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 8:37 pm
Hydrostatic Dazza wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 7:11 pm
ge_rik wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2021 5:10 pm

More likely - longjohns, parkah, sou'wester and fur lined boots

Rik
If you did that here in Queensland at this time, you would be rushed off to hospital and given drugs.
More likely taken straight to the funny farm to wean you off the drugs.

SWMBO commented that "it is a bit nippy this morning" in Bundy temp 23C presently Max forecast 27C
Captain Plod is losing the plot. His apologies. Not helped by Ian Chappell on the radio
Cheers from Dazza, The Hydrostatic Lubricator 8)
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Mr Spectre's POR inspection. Part One. His arrival

Post by Hydrostatic Dazza » Sun Dec 26, 2021 11:58 pm

Mr Spectre inspects the Potter’s Orchid Railway (POR)
Part one.
We are led to believe that Mr Spectre has been spending far in excess of his allocated travel budget during this Australian expedition. Some say most of his trouble stems from his enthusiastic shouting (buying) of rounds at the Railway Pubs he visits although Mr Spectre claims that inspecting the Railway’s eating and drinking establishments is part of his railway inspection obligations, but others will argue that this is total bull poo poo. Some say because it is the first time he has escaped the shackles of Mother with who he lives with at 62 West Wallaby st Wigan Lancashire and so he has let his hair down and has a become a wee bit, errr, loose lately. Whatever the truth may be it seems his expenditure is not helped by the attentions he devotes to many of the local lasses he meets during his land down under expedition. This is understandable as he is a long way from home and a man is not a camel and as it has been a long time between drinks and these lasses seemed so friendly then before you know it….(Ed, what would mother think? ) It is best we skip past he details of what usually follows. So mailing himself via regular Australia Parcel Post seemed at the time to be a good way to make reductions to his travel expenditure between pubs/railways and also to be a good opportunity to grab a wee rest, sleep off the hangovers and recover his strength that keeps being severely diminished by the friendliness of the local lasses. However it may have not been such a great idea after all.
Mr Spectre is to be seen constantly dictating to his phone his observations, comments and also local lasses’s contact details. (Opportunities are not to be missed) His pommy accent is a winner with the local girls as they give significant comfort and sympathy to him especially as his home country’s cricket team's batsman are being severely being bashed up by the Aussie bowling on the hard fast Aussie pitches down here. So what follows are edited extracts from the Dictaphone dairies recorded by Mr Spectre during his visit to the Potter’s Orchid Railway in South East Queensland
.

Image1

THUMP
“I demand someone let me out of this effing box” “I have a had a gutful of this, it is hot, bloody dark in here and I am bloody thirsty and I am about to wee myself if I cannot get some relief soon. I am fed up with being tossed about by these Australia Post delivery contractors, they drive like effing lunatics… %@#*!^#%!!”
(Ed. It seems the intended recovery rest was not quite realised)

Image2
"Oh. That is a wee improvement, it appears things have settled down somewhat"

Image
“Gentle rocking, this sounds familiar, ahhhh, the soothing sounds of a railway ?"

Image
“Aghhh my bladder, I demand to be released, this is no way to treat a man of my position and standing … let me out this instant”

Image
“Hey, fellas, can any of youse hear that racket coming from that trunk on Bazza’s flat wagon?”
Captain Plod speaks up. “Ignore it, it just sounds like another whinging Pommy upset at the result of the first Ashes test that finished this arvo, he’ll get over it, who wants another beer ?”


Image
“what the eff, I get the impression I have been transhipped, these colonials, give me the SH—S !”

Image
“whoa, what the heck, was that an emergency stop ?”

Image
Agghhh, what the fa-k is happening………..”

Image
“blimey that felt like an elevator drop! Is that the sound of running water?”
“Well at least the gentle rocking motion is a wee bit more pleasant, but that sound of running water is not helping me with my bladder”
“Oh, I am starting to feel a bit quezy now, a wee bit sea sick”
“Let me out I am about to spew,…..let me out this instant or I will….” (ed, all this will not have helped his 3 day hang over from his last railway inspection and his exhaustion from those two lasses who could …..)


Image
“It seems the jolt popped the latches of my trunk. A wee prise might do the trick, Grunt, heave, YAY I am out.
Fresh air AGHHH what the hell are those blue monsters in the water, do they want to eat me like every other effing plant and animal in Australia?
That dog, it looks familiar, why is it is looking at me with that puzzled look.
Who are these people ?
Those blue fish monsters, they seemed to have pushed me to the river bank”


Image
“What, who are you, these dogs and
errr who is this penguin, he looks vaguely familiar ?"


Image
Errrr, cough wheeze
“what, where, what happened, what, where am I ? by any chance have you got any aspirin on you?”
Another cough and wheeze and cough again. (editor, must have been the stuff those girls had him smoke before they… )
“Could you excuse me for a moment, I just have to duck in behind this tree for a wee moment”
“Thanks for waiting, I needed that, now where were we, ah yes, introduction formalities ?”
“G'day, my name is Dazza and this is MAM and the lads, houza ya bum for grubs ?”
“errr, good afternoon, how is your bum for grubs ? oh never mind, I have a wee upset tummy, seems I have had a rough trip, could you help me out, where, what has happened to me ?”
"We are from the Potter’s Orchid Railway, the guard of the 5.45 from Orchid House Loop reported to management that a trunk had fallen off the side of Bazza’s flat wagon in his consist after the transhipment at Potter’s Junction. It seems the lads loading Bazza’s train have a had a bit too much of a liquid lunch again yesterday and they forgot to tie down your trunk. Second time this week this has happened. Actually Wazza who was driving your train was a bit hung over as well and he got confused. He wanted to pull his whistle cord (wink wink) because he reckons he saw Nigella skinny dipping down here again but instead he pulled the brake lever around into emergency. The jolt must have sent your trunk into Red Bridge Gorge. Wazza has a few roos loose in the top paddock and we all know Nigella is not here today, she is in her kitchen today. Some thing about needing to earn a few gold coins to pay her dealer."
“what!”
Editor. Mr Spectre at this point seemed to recover enough to muster up a wee bit more composure.
“Let me introduce myself, I am Mr Spectre, on secondment from the UK. I am here to inspect the Potter’s Orchid Railway and send a report back to Gardenrails.org ”. “Would you be any chance happen to have some aspirin on you ? “
“Oh, we have been expecting you, I am Dazza and this is MAM, we are most pleased to meet you.”
"Errrr hello, my head hurts, err pleased to meet you, I think so, what day is it ? "
Dazza stopped the next passing train and arranged the crew to give Mr Spectre a lift to his lodgings.


Image
“This guards van is covered in manure and by heck it stinks !
“What will become of me here?”
“Will Anderson ever get the Kookaburra to swing down here”
“Gods of Brunel, grant me kind grace, help me out, please “
“Guard, would you by chance have any aspirin ?”
“why is this lamp upside down?”


To be continued.
Last edited by Hydrostatic Dazza on Sun Oct 09, 2022 11:07 pm, edited 12 times in total.
Cheers from Dazza, The Hydrostatic Lubricator 8)
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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by philipy » Mon Dec 27, 2021 6:51 am

Classic!!!
Philip

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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by ge_rik » Mon Dec 27, 2021 8:16 am

A heck of a start to his inspection. Makes you wonder what his report is going to look like 😱

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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by Hydrostatic Dazza » Mon Dec 27, 2021 8:45 am

ge_rik wrote: Mon Dec 27, 2021 8:16 am A heck of a start to his inspection. Makes you wonder what his report is going to look like 😱

Rik
Stay tuned, more in the weeks to come.
Cheers from Dazza, The Hydrostatic Lubricator 8)
The chances of finding out what’s really going on in the universe are so remote, the only thing to do is hang the sense of it and keep yourself occupied. Douglas Adams

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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by Old Man Aaron » Tue Dec 28, 2021 2:58 am

This'll be a treat. :D

I see what you mean regarding welding goggles! Will have to bring a pair when I come down there one of these days.. :lol:
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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by Lonsdaler » Wed Dec 29, 2021 11:25 am

I was asked to pass on this message:
Mr Mainwaring (Captain, retired) general manager of the Greta And Wenningdale Light Railway, sends his regards to Mr Spectre, but expresses his concern at the apparent lapse in behaviour expected from an Englishman in his capacity as a railway official. It's just not cricket Sir!

Personally, I'm thoroughly enjoying his latest escapades down under, and can't wait to hear more - it's far better than any other news from down under lately (purely regarding sport, obviously :lol: )
Phil

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My Line - https://gardenrails.org/forum/viewtopic ... 41&t=11077

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Re: The Potters Orchid Railway

Post by Hydrostatic Dazza » Thu Dec 30, 2021 12:39 am

Lonsdaler wrote: Wed Dec 29, 2021 11:25 am I was asked to pass on this message:
Mr Mainwaring (Captain, retired) general manager of the Greta And Wenningdale Light Railway, sends his regards to Mr Spectre, but expresses his concern at the apparent lapse in behaviour expected from an Englishman in his capacity as a railway official. It's just not cricket Sir!

Personally, I'm thoroughly enjoying his latest escapades down under, and can't wait to hear more - it's far better than any other news from down under lately (purely regarding sport, obviously :lol: )
The POR management team and the chair of the directors will pass on Mr Mainwaring's regards to Mr Spectre, once we have relocated him or he presents himself to staff of the POR as he has not been seen or heard of since he de-trained some time ago at the junction of Orchid House Loop and was given directions of how to proceed on foot to the POR's HQ and his lodgings. Please note the treasurer of the POR will be pursing the significant matter of Mr Spectre traveling on the POR metals without a valid pass or a valid ticket.
Sincerely Captain Plod POR
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Mr Spectre inspects the Potter’s Orchid Railway Part Two

Post by Hydrostatic Dazza » Thu Dec 30, 2021 1:48 am

Brakes apply hard, followed by the familiar odour of hot cast iron brake blocks that all railway men well know, then a jolting halt.
(Ed Apparently the loco on this train does not have a Slomo fitted)

“Mate, this is where you have to get off”
“Why”
“We are going this way and ya gotta go that way to get to HQ”
“But how do I get there ?”
“Yagotta leg it matey”
“Is there any trains going that way so…”
“No more trains going that way till after 21.00, it will be bloody dark then and the big effing hairies will be out and about. ”
“What are the big errr harires ?”
“Huntsman matey, best to keep clear of them fellas”
“How long will take me to walk there? “
"Its not far, you’ll be right”
Toot , a toot toot
“We're off see ya around like a rissole “
“Which way, how far ?”
The guard points in a direction
“that way matey…” the rest of the guards message was lost as the train departed to where ever.
He is tired, bruised, it is hot and humid, the skin on his nose and neck is getting a bit of a red tinge from the UV that earns Queensland the reputation for being the skin cancer capital of the world, however Mr Spectre realises there is no other option, but to start walking muttering
“hairies, huntsman , what on earth does this all mean ?”
“I think he said this way ?”


Image
“Or was it the other way? It was the other way, yes, I will go that way, blimey it is hot
(Ed. He is not helped by his heavy hi vis coat mother said he must wear so as to not catch a chill)
Mr Spectre thinks to himself,

“No wonder the locals wear thongs and shorts and have cold beverages in their hands at all times."

Image
"By gosh the cows are effing big here, these beasts are most likely the cause of that sharp stop. Typical of the unfenced lines around here , tsk tsk”
“Approaching large cows, actually very large cows, they appear to not want to eat me, this is a refreshing change to the other fauna and flora here. “


Image
"Must keep moving to get there before dark." Perspiration soaking him as he trods along the track towards who knows where, not a soul in sight.

Image
"Nice looking signal that."
The natural urges of a railway inspector kick in, up the ladder like a rat up a drain pipe he goes.
“I must inspect and make notes for my report”
"Fully working mechanical lower quadrant semaphore, working lamps, appears to be electrically lit, but the blue lens and white LEDS is not correct. Will have to check these later during the night. If no errr Hairies are about. Possibly a Pendle Valley Model’s kit with some modifications, Workmanship satisfactory.”
Distant conversations and merriment can be heard on the wafting breeze.
“This breeze is a refreshing change, however cool changes may indicate approaching thunderstorms, must press on to locate the POR HQ and my lodgings before evening is upon me” (Ed. Beware of the Hairies!)

Image
“UK imported Peco SM 32 track. Well laid, crowed rail for the curves, kink free, top and line satisfactory for narrow gauge operations. Track to bed brass screw to masonry plug fastenings quite satisfactory. Track bed substantial poured concrete with no signs of movement and minimal cracking. Track requires urgent ballasting with good 2-3mm granite chips. Vegetation management satisfactory”

Image
Might have been the cool breeze, might have been the aspirin taking effect, Mr Spectre starts humming a few tunes.
“I keep a close watch on this heart of mine
I keep my eyes wide open all the time.
I keep the ends out for the tie that binds
Because you're mine,
I walk the line”


Image
“Well, we know where we're goin'
But we don't know where we've been
And we know what we're knowin'
But we can't say what we've seen”


Image
Mr Spectre comes to a red bridge spanning a rocky gorge, it looks familiar, however his recollections are still hazy.
“Bridge appears to be well made, MVL imported from the UK. Concrete abutments appear to have been modified to accommodate this bridge. No walking planks fitted between the rails to facilitate workers crossing this bridge in safety. Tsk tsk!” “also appears to have decorative lighting fitted. No doubt for the visiting tourists at this time of the year”
A double headed goods train trundles into view and passes just before Mr Spectre was about to attempt to cross the ravine.
“ Locos appear clean and well maintained, the Yellow Bundy Fowler has a Slomo fitted, no whistle warnings were heard before the train crossed this bridge. Will investigate further to confirm if these locos have whistles fitted, or inoperative or simply driver complacency”.
Mr Spectre presses on.


Image
“18.05, I have come across a cactus garden, strange sounds emanate from some where behind those rocks.”
Mr Spectre contemplates these noises and he recalls the words of the guard about the “big Hairies”
He presses on again, admiring these cactus plants he has not seen before back home.

Image
“What the fark, sh-t !”
Mr Spectre’s thorough and extensive training from the “Academy of Garden Railway Inspection” especially the module of what to do when confronted by flesh eating dinosaurs when down under such as a Carnosouraus proved to be very useful and so as recalled in his training,“Prey runs, so stay very still” he remained motionless and very quiet.
It is most likely the Carnosorous thought that eating this strange fella in his thick hi vis coat would prove to be a bit too chewie and as his digestion has been rather delicate lately he wandered off to the ravine to get his evening drink and maybe knock over a few of those late afternoon skinny dippers for his supper. They are most palatable with out their clothes to chew through. So Carnosorous left Mr Spectre to a fate of his own doing.
After this confrontation Mr Spectre felt relieved that he was not traveling through a large reptile’s digestive track.
(Ed, Mr Spectre has omitted from his dairy that he will need a change of underwear)


Image
After a light shower of rain, (Ed. Mother's wise advice about his coat eh !) Mr Spectre has a wee lift of spirits when he leaves the cactus garden as he has entered what he thinks must be Potter’s Junction station yard.
“Have arrived at a small station yard, possibly Potter’s Junction, no yard board signs erected, no buildings can be seen, no signalling installed, it is obvious that the 20mm sunset stone is being used as temporary weed suppression while awaiting further infrastructure embellishments to be added.”


To be continued, if he gets to POR HQ and the Harries do not find him first.
Last edited by Hydrostatic Dazza on Sun Oct 09, 2022 11:11 pm, edited 16 times in total.
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Mr Spectre inspects the Potter’s Orchid RailwayPart Three

Post by Hydrostatic Dazza » Thu Dec 30, 2021 5:36 am

Mr Spectre continues walking on through the yard but as he did not fully catch all of the guard’s directions (he lays some blame on the Aussie accent and general destruction of proper English down here.) on exiting the yard he mistakenly takes the track leading off to the right rather than taking the left track. This can be appreciated as his feathers are still rather ruffled after meeting a medium sized prehistoric Australian reptile that lurks in the cactus garden and also the effects of the aspirin are diminishing.
Image

“I don’t recall that fool who thinks he is a guard mentioning a tunnel in his directions.”
(Ed. He didn’t, but he did mention a stone over bridge but that was if you had taken the left yard exit)
"I cannot hear any approaching trains and the lack of installed signalling does not give warning clues of approaching trains”
“I suppose there is no other option, throw usual caution to the wind, press on”

"It is dark in here, a bit creepy, what are those reflections on the tunnel roof ? It is very creepy in here. It as though there are hundreds of eyes looking down at me."
(Ed. Those reflections from your Dictaphone’s light torch are off the many eyes of the “Hairies” Best you be ignorant about these for the time being)
Mr Spectre stumbles over a few giant snails he encounters in this very dark tunnel as he continues his way through. To keep his spirits up starts he is onto another Johnny Cash tune .

I Hear The Train A-Comin'; It's Rollin' 'Round The Bend,
And I Ain't Seen The Sunshine Since I Don't Know When,


“Oh dear, that was a whistle, I hear a train train approaching around this bend, there does not appear to be a man refuge in here, oh, gods of Churchwood good grief !"
Mr Spectre’s thorough and extensive physical training he received while studying at the “Academy of Garden Railway Inspection” in Lancashire proved very useful, in particular the 220 shunting yard dash while carrying a clip board and Dictaphone. Mr Spectre actually won a silver medal in the final of the 220 yards during his last semester at the Academy. You could say he was the first of the losers that year.

Image
After managing to see the light at the end of the tunnel, in particular this tunnel he musters up a decent gallop despite his fatigue, well it could be life or be dashed to death over the buffer beam of a Lady Ann, he manages to scramble his way to the top of the portal. It is not understood why Mr Spectre hurriedly climbed all the way to the top of the tunnel portal, but he did utter
“This is becoming intolerable, it is simply enough for one day.”
He pauses after the train has passed, his heart rate and breathing return to normal rate, he musters up a mediocre measure of composure.
"The unpainted Lady Ann loco, runs well, very smoothly, obviously equipped with a Slomo mech."
However his moral sinks even further because he checked into his cricket follow app on his Dictaphone.
“Good grief, the colonials are going to win the third Ashes test by an innings “
If Mr Spectre is being honest, he was now feeling the tinges of home sickness for 67 Wallaby st and a nice good cup of tea and biscuit with mother before she serves him his supper. However, it seems that the well trained instincts of an inspector of Mr Spectre’s statue and reputation once again kick in.

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“Tunnel Portal is made from clay, fired in a local gas kiln, painted and appears sound but with noticeable alignment defects to the inner poured reinforced concrete walls and roof. However appears satisfactory and sound”
Mr Spectre climbs down from the portal and and continues on his journey, the blisters on his heels are starting to make themselves known.

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"Oh, could it be ? yes, yes I do recall the guard mentioning that I have to cross over a stone arch bridge and I will be at the front door to the offices of the POR."

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"Are these horses friendly, can I get past them or will they eat me ? "
Ed. It seems Mr Spectre is becoming wee bit paranoid.
Using one of the many skills Mr Spectre learnt during his time at the Academy he passes quietly and slowly past the two horses, who seemed quite nonplussed by his presence as they keep a keen lookout for the expected Bundy with a string of cane trucks on the hook to pass by soon, which is most exciting for such thorough breds.
ED. Mr Ed and Francis are well known local train spotters who frequent this bridge. In-between frolicking in a nice nearby paddock they are often seen to be looking over the bridge to watch the POR trains pass by. Some say they get a high sniffing the burnt butane fumes and especially frolicky when they get a sniff of a genuine coal fired loco as it passes by. It is just what horses do here at the Potter’s Orchid Railway.


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“Oh, I see a building, that must be the POR offices, yay! Thank the god of Stanier, I have made it.“
Mr Spectre would have to admit he approached the building with some trepidation.
“POR offices, I think this is the correct location, this building, it appears to be, errr , rustic at best. One would expect better for the offices of a public railway.”

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“Windows are missing, it is looks incomplete. There seems to be a commotion upstairs, a gathering of some sort. “

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“No door knocker or buzzer, no signage to designate the building's purpose”
"There is a note on the door, it reads Welcome Mr Spectre, howsa ya bum for grubs? Come in, up the stairs to the board room”

Mr Spectre enters the building after kicking the door in. It is fortunate that he is wearing his steel capped boots. He has no idea why he put the door back on it’s hinges. Perhaps it just his tidy habit well learnt from his Mother's good parenting.

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“Confirmed, there is no window glazing fitted to this building’s lower floors.”
“Load voices and merriment is emanating from upstairs, I will investigate”
“My last will and testament is with mother ”

Mr Spectre's Hobnby/Triang OO collection will find a safe home if he meets his premature demise.
"Hello is there anybody here ?
Ed of course there is,
No response so he repeats his question a bit louder.
"Hello is there anybody here ?
"About bloody time, Mr Spectre, come on up the stairs."

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"Hey every one, Mr Spectre is here, where have ya been, what have you been up to ? Howsa ya bum for grubs? Pull up a chair, sit down, kick ya boots off, we'll get ya a plate of tucker, sorry we had to start without you, or our tucker would have gone cold, what kept you?"
Mr Spectre mumbles into his Dictaphone.
“Board members and social visitors seem friendly despite being loud and rather uncouth. “

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"We are just studying our latest addition to our Safe Working System. This upgrade will be useful to our operations. What do you think of that eh, marvelous work there from John, it will white wash over everything and tidy up discrepancies. That John fella is a clever fella. What ya say to that eh ?"
“ Railway infrastructure seems satisfactory, standards reasonable however deep investigation into the operating parameters, documentation and safe working procedures of the POR will be urgently required as there seems to be serious shortcomings and breeches of standard operational practices”


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"You look thirsty, let me pour you a glass, this will slide nicely down past the tonsils, it's a nice South Australian Shiraz that Hugh brought along, bless him, hey you don’t grow this nectar up in your neck of the woods eh
Cheers to Mr Spectre everyone"

Clink sounds of glasses.
"I reckon by the way Mr Spectre downed that glass he was mighty thirsty."

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Oh, I think Mr Spectre has turned in for the night.
He did not say much!


To be continued.
Cheers from Dazza, The Hydrostatic Lubricator 8)
The chances of finding out what’s really going on in the universe are so remote, the only thing to do is hang the sense of it and keep yourself occupied. Douglas Adams

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